There are different ways that we abuse each other. There are at least physical, mental, and what we call "soul" abuse. Physical and mental abuse are more obvious though often unrecognized. Soul abuse is less obvious and even more frequently unrecognized.

This is a story about the soul abuse of a student. This story is repeated every day in schools throughout the nation. "A Tale of Two Teachers" revolves around the mandala drawing exercise in an Intuition in Management class. Here is her story:

"My Mandala Drawing Experience"

When we were first shown the sample mandalas that we had to do for the Journal entries every week, I had two major reactions. The first was that I felt I was not going to be able to complete the task successfully. The reason was that I had never considered myself a creative person.

I had never been able, before this course, to sit in front of a blank sheet of paper and draw much of anything. One of the reasons was that I had been taught that reading and writing were the most important skills for an individual. Thus the emphasis has been on developing these skills to their fullest. I have found that other skills, such as non-verbal expression, have been considered relatively unimportant.

My second reaction to the mandala drawing assignment was "What is the purpose of these drawings?" I did not understand why I should waste my time in this way. I expected that each drawing would take me a couple of hours to do considering that I had never been exposed to anything like this before. However after my first few drawings, I began to search for the deeper meaning that each drawing held.

As My Attitude Began to Change

It took me a few more drawings to realize that drawing is a way to express my ideas and values in a different language. This language is more expressive and powerful than mere words. At this point, I began to understand that one purpose of the drawings was to open my mind so that I would be able to see things in a different light. This stimulated the diversity of my thought, which in turn allowed me to devise more creative solutions for my day-do-day personal problems as well as professional situations.

As I reviewed my drawings, I could clearly see the point where drawing the mandalas became an interesting and fulfilling experience instead of a dull and pointless exercise. As I started to make a connection between the mandalas and my verbal expression, I began to view the drawings as a form of unwritten expression. After a few more entries, sitting to draw the mandalas become a four hour vacation from the hostile world which surrounded me.

What made the drawing experiences so rewarding was that they offered me an opportunity for "an immediate return on my investment." For the past four years I have invested thousands of hours in assignments whose gains are still "accounts receivable." In contrast after spending four or five hours drawing my mandalas, I received an immediate and tangible satisfaction. I could sit back and view my effort in front of me.

A few weeks ago when I received the mandorla drawing assignment, I was like a kid, who after playing with a simple toy for a while, was given a new and more challenging toy.

An Early Personal Experience

As a way of helping you understand some of these initial difficulties, I would like to share an experience that has been one of the main reasons for my not wanting to express my feelings through drawing. In previous situations in my life that required drawing, I had been judged and told to give it up.

Specifically, I remember an experience that I had in my fifth grade art class. The man who was my teacher saw my first drawing and said "This is terrible. Didn't anyone ever tell you how to draw?" My reply to the teacher was "Well, isn't that what you are here for?" And his reply was "There is no way that I can teach you how to draw. Look at your drawing, you'll never learn. You are a lost cause."

I remember that day as if it were yesterday although it was over twelve years ago. After that day, I never really attempted to draw anything because I was afraid that I would get the same reaction all over again. Even when I first started to draw the mandalas, I was afraid to the point that I did not want to show them to anyone.

This feeling was reinforced by my having to do so much explaining to family and friends, and other students and professors about why I had to do these drawing assignments. "Did you switch your major?" a close friend asked. "Is that for a business class? No way, that is not business." said a stranger in the library.

A Similar Recent Experience

I would also like to share an experience from this term that mirrors my fifth grade art teacher's attitude. I met with one of my management professors to explain why I wanted to submit a late assignment for his class. As I was talking to him, I opened my book bag, and he saw a couple of my mandala drawings.

He said, "I am sorry but I cannot accept your assignment when I see that you have time to engage in childish drawing but you can't turn your work in on time." For the next twenty minutes I did my best to explain what the "weird" drawings were and that they were not a hobby but an assignment for my Intuition in Management class.

Because of experiences like these with the two teachers, I hated drawing the mandalas at the beginning of the semester. I must have read the section explaining their purpose at least five times. I just could not make a connection between the cut-throat business world and some circular drawings.

Twice I came close to dropping the class. But I realized the drawings were part of this course and that since this course is a requirement, I would have to learn to like them. From that point on, I started viewing the mandala drawing experience as an opportunity to become a better rounded person. I soon understood that good managers are those who can adjust and be flexible. Since my goal was to become a good manager, I decided I would have to adjust and to make the best of this situation.

Connecting With The Intuitive Self

Drawing the mandalas as well as the mandorlas has helped me achieve a deeper understanding of myself. The drawings allowed me to see myself as a different person by allowing The Intuitive Self to play a larger part in my being. My intuitive knowing had been so inactive for so long and so incredibly neglected that once given an opportunity, I was able to disclose much more about myself than I ever expected.

As you can see, my mandala and mandorla drawing experiences have given me an opportunity to better understand myself by playing the role of tour guide into my complex and often confusing inner self. Thank you for introducing me to the colorful world of mandala drawing and to the variety and depth that I have discovered within myself.

Learning from Her Experience

What can we learn from this student's experiences with the two teachers. First, we should take great care in the comments we make about other's abilities and interests especially if they are different from our own. We may unwittingly say something to harm their soul - that is further isolate them from their Intuitive Selves. We all long to reconnect with this source to reestablish our natural expressiveness.

Second, we should be diligent concerning what others say about our abilities and interests especially if they express disapproval. We should take care that we do not allow others to unwittingly or maliciously belittle our efforts. The damage those comments can do to our tentative efforts to reconnect with our creative source is incalculable.

While drawing, we may encounter people who will not understand what we are doing with the drawings. They will react the way we probably would initially. Only they will not have the opportunity to actually experience the discovery process. We should try not to let their lack of understanding get in the way of our work.

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